Firsts - Part Three



I'm not sure who all will end up reading this, maybe just Me, Myself and I!! And I would understand. But for some reason I feel compelled to write about the past two years before moving ahead...maybe it's therapy. In a strange sort of way it makes me feel better to write about those experiences. Bear with me if you drop into the blog...I'll get past this stuff !!!


I called Tami around 4a.m. that morning and, of course, woke her...not that she'd gotten a lot of sleep that night. I was trying to keep her posted as often as I heard. I know it was frustrating for her to wait for the calls and not be there, but it was what we thought was best at the time. Remember, this wasn't suppose to go like this! When I reached her I couldn't hold back my tears and of course neither could she. But, between her and Todd, they found her a ticket and got her to the airport so she could get home that morning. She came in around 11:00 that morning and I was so glad to see her. Her good friend Stacey had picked her up for me and brought her to the hospital. We hugged...tight! Since she was there and could be a contact for the Dr, I decided to go home and get a little bit of rest. Judy had been with me through the night and she needed sleep too. She wouldn't leave me and I was glad. Never in my life had I felt so helpless. When the Dr had told us how bad he was I cried into her arms and felt like my Mom was there to comfort me in Judy's body. I love my sister.

As I remember it, I was only gone for 2-3 hours and upon returning to the hospital, all of my family had gathered. Bob and Dad came up and I cried with each embrace. I love them both so much. My family has always been important to me, but never more that at that moment. Dad had actually packed his bags and was going to be picked up by Aunt Gae to go off to Hawaii for a little vacation that morning. He cancelled his trip and came to LDS Hospital instead. I hated to see him lose out on this trip, but I was so glad he chose to stay home. To me, that meant I love you and I love Gordon and I won't take the chance of not being here if something were to happen and it meant the world to me. I don't care how old we get in life, we still want our Moms and Dads near us.

Through this day, Gordon went through more surgeries. They had to leave him open the night before because his organs were swollen and they couldn't physically pull his skin together. They also still had to reconnect his bowel. I've waited too long to write this all down so will forget some details, but he was not in good shape. At this point, I had spent some time in the Shock Trauma ICU room with him and was amazed at the efficiency of the ICU nurses. They are the best of the best...have to be to handle what comes through there. Some were abrupt, some seemed a little crazy, some were warm, but all were efficient and knew what they were doing and tried the best they could to let me know what they were doing. A beehive comes to mind. All the bees are very busy and each has their assignments. Sometimes my head would spin watching them come and go, but it was a good feeling to know they were so attentive.

A little later on in the day Brother Craig came back with his adorable and sweet wife Shirley. They stayed for a little bit, but knew that we were in good hands and went on home. Many people stopped by including Bishop Larsen, who is another on my list of heroes. I wish I could describe to you how desperate and shattered and frightened I was, but words don't seem to come...just tears...even almost two years later. But, the up side was that I was not alone in those first few days for even a moment. Heavenly Father surrounded Gordon and me with earthly angels (and heavenly ones too, I'm sure) through our entire ordeal. It was confirmation to me that Gordon and I were loved.